The Psychology of Happiness
Thomas Hardy once said, “Happiness is but an occasional episode in a general drama of pain.” Human beings aspire to achieve multiple goals like power, prosperity, love, and freedom, but usually, their ultimate endeavor is to attain happiness. Regrettably, we struggle to define happiness and determine whether an individual is truly happy. Other factors like wealth, education, success, popularity, and intelligence related to a specific person can be judged by various methods, but happiness remains a riddle to be solved. For example, we can be completely wrong if we try to gauge a person’s happiness by using their behavior as a litmus test because they may pretend to be happy just to hide their unhappiness.
The issue is further complicated by the fact that it is impossible to fully assess one’s own happiness. The only possible way to measure happiness is to evaluate others’ happiness without taking their behavior into consideration. Here are some tests that may help you judge others’ happiness.
Be Happy in Your Happiness
It is said that a happy person always feels happy in others’ happiness. But usually, this is not the case, as most of the time, others’ happiness is painful for us, and occasionally, it leads to suffering out of envy or jealousy. This tendency occurs in human beings because unhappiness is more common in our daily lives compared to happiness. By acknowledging happiness, one may contribute to one’s own happiness.
Comfortable in One’s Own Company
Humans are known as social animals, and they actively seek out other people’s company. Deprivation of company often leads to depression and dejection, as solitary confinement is considered the hardest punishment. In the meantime, being overly obsessed with social interaction indicates that a person is not content with their life. At times, one should try to adjust to oneself, as one cannot run away from one’s own self.
Acquiescence of One’s Background
Anybody who disowns their background and origin cannot be a joyful person. A highly successful person should always cherish their humble past with pride, as it is proof of their hard work, intelligence, and perseverance. According to psychology, personality disorders or unhappiness have a direct relationship with someone hiding or rejecting their background. Conversely, an overemphasis on one’s past grandeur may lead to unhappiness. Relentless lament and excessive preoccupation with the past spoil the present and prophesy a bleak future. The important thing is that what is true of individuals usually proves to be true of nations as well.
Making an Exhibition of One’s Happiness
Happiness and misery are personal experiences. Excessive outward displays of happiness signify conceit, suggesting that the individual is performing it for the attention of others rather than for their own satisfaction. One should understand the difference between enjoyment and happiness. Enjoyment and entertainment are not indicative of happiness. Overemphasis on such endeavors points toward a sense of dejection in the practitioner. The tendency to commit suicide after Christmas and New Year celebrations in the West particularly illustrates that happiness is not inherently linked to festival celebrations and entertainment, as it is fundamentally an internal state. For those who aggressively seek happiness, it remains elusive.
Contentment
Normally, happiness is associated with success, and success is measured in terms of wealth, power, or fame. But one has to remember that success is not effortless, particularly in today’s competitive world. If someone achieves a certain level of success but it is not up to the standard they aspired to, it contributes to unhappiness rather than happiness. As Emily Dickinson rightly said:
“Success is counted sweetest,
By those who never succeed.
To comprehend a nectar
Requires sorest need.”
Everything has a cost, and so it is with success. It can be an ingredient in the realm of happiness but not happiness itself. If achieving success comes at the expense of filial love, respect for values, appreciation of the arts, and family life, it can be considered a hollow victory.
Unhappiness is the outcome of limited human endeavor and the non-fulfillment of desired goals. The only way to attain happiness is to be content with what you have. A person devoid of contentment is devoid of happiness. Furthermore, one must understand that pain is a more constant feature of human life than happiness, and acceptance of this facet, paradoxically, may be helpful in the pursuit of happiness.
The views and opinions expressed in this article/paper are the author’s own and do not necessarily reflect the editorial position of The Spine Times.
Nasir Imtiaz
Nasir Imtiaz is the content strategist of The Spine Times.
